08 December 2008

torture

i have this sick facination with tormenting myself. i supose the more i do it, the more i will hopefully get my shit together. its not working.

everyday that i wake up brings me one step closer to hitting bottom. one step closer to taking a whole bottle or five of whatever is in the cabinet.
and as christmas draws near, and every day that i have to go to work i prepare myself for the enevitable. theres nothing left for me anymore. ive let myself go.

i cant even get drunk anymore.

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